The iRant


There is no real structure to this piece. Just a collection of thoughts in my head about wrestling general. Not really Scottish wrestling related per se but there are some bits and bobs in there. I shouldn’t have to say this but;
I love professional wrestling. I think if you’ve stumbled upon my website then you can clearly see that. I take the good and bad and overall find the positives. I don’t advertise myself as a “critic” or even a “reviewer”, I’m a fan who loves wrestling so much that I have to get that out there for people to see. Some may call it being a mark. I couldn’t care less about how you pigeon hole what I am. I’ve done things that I couldn’t have dreamed about 2 years ago. Yet, it offends me when I read “reviews” that are misguided, biased and just plain wrong. I’m all for opinion, the majority of my writing on OSWtv is opinion, but to post nonsense that doesn’t even make sense blows my mind.
(The irony being that I’m about to post a rant about tiny things that I dislike in wrestling)
Wrestling terminology is misused and it grinds my gears constantly. If your favourite loses then they’re “buried” and has “heat”, if they win they’re being “pushed” and if they use the phrase “the boys in the back” then it’s clearly a “shoot”. The poor use of terminology is a big one. “Buried”, “Push”, “Heat”, “Over”, words that are misused on a daily basis. Sometimes a talent gets buried, sometimes there is a bigger picture. Just because they have lost, doesn’t always mean they are “buried”. If the internet had its way Slater, Cesaro, Ryder, Ziggler, Wyatt and Ambrose would win every week against Cena in 6 on 1 handicap matches that last three hours, okay maybe not 3 hours, Reigns will Superman punch Miz during ad breaks on the WWE App (which is free to download).
If you are annoyed by poor wrestling terminology then avoid the WWE YouTube channel, because OH BOY they are some hilarious comments that boil my blood. Actually, it doesn’t make me angry, it confuses me that these people can be let out in society. “Fire Jhon Cena” aye, because your comment will go back to Vince and he’ll go, “you know OrtunGurl1997 is right, we should fire John Cena. I don’t like making money so our biggest money spinner should be removed from the company haw haw haw”.
If you are a professional wrestling company. Please use grammar in your tweets, Facebook posts and anything else so that it shows that you are professional. Last thing I want to see is “Cum c our shoe, tickets stil availble”, automatic switch off.
Clinging onto past glories. I’m looking at you, Shane Douglas and also you, Tommy Dreamer. ECW folded 13 years ago. Get over it. Using ECW to get pops during a promo just proves that you cannot get over on your own and your vain attempt to re-create lightning in a bottle is just sad.
Speaking of sad, Rey Mysterio. This guy should just retire. He can’t catch a break (unless it’s his knee). He takes a 6 month vacation, twice a year (thank you Google for that gem).
Did you know that the WWE Network is ONLY $9.99? Y’know what I can also get for $9.99? About £6.20 which would be enough to get a sledgehammer from a cheap retail outlet and smash my TV, laptop, tablet, phone and anything else that informs me that the WWE Network is only $9.99.
Speaking of my gears being grinded, what the hell happened to WWE DVD covers? Spoilers! I don’t want to look at the cover of a DVD and see spoilers. Would you buy The Sixth Sense if it says on the cover “Bruce Willis is a ghost” (dated reference, I know) NO. Then why would I buy Summerslam 2013 with Randy Orton holding the WWE Title over a fallen Daniel Bryan on the cover when the match card on the back has John Cena vs Daniel Bryan for the belt?
Are The Beautiful People now ironic? Angelina Love has seen better days, I want to buy her a sandwich and give her a cuddle. She’ll break in the ring like a wishbone. She looks like a Barbie that has been drawn on by a 6 year old girl with felt tip pens.
“CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk!” He took his ball and went home 8 months ago. WWE will troll constantly because they can. The chants will die down then WWE will air the CM Punk documentary on the WWE Network ($9.99) and the mindless sheep will be back, “CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk!” like puppets. It’s quite amazing to see WWE control people so effortlessly.
WWE 2K15 on the PS3 and Xbox 360 will not include career mode. Cheers 2K for slapping everyone that can’t afford to spend £300 on a new console in the face by taking out a feature that fans have been screaming out for for a long time.
I can’t believe people still hate John Cena so much. At this point I’m fairly certain that the majority are doing it to look cool. The fact that these people then ridicule others for having a differing opinion is hilarious. Who are you to tell me who I can and can’t like when you are basing your likes on the majority like a sheep. Have your own opinion, you jerk.
Oh and finally, speaking of differing opinions, there is having a different opinion and there’s just being an idiot. I seriously saw someone write that British wrestling was in decline. DECLINE. ICW have had sell out after sell out this year including The Barrowlands with only one match announced so far! WrestleZone packed 1300 people into the Beach Ballroom for Aberdeen Anarchy, last year SWE sold out the Ardler Complex on A WEDNESDAY NIGHT and that’s just Scotland. To call that a decline shows amazing ignorance that blows my mind.
Other than that though, I love professional wrestling.